I heart David Shrigley.
A Bedtime Story
One day I was walking in the woods when I heard the terrible roar of a monster. It filled me with fear and I ran back to the village to alert the community. At first some members of the community did not believe me (as my reputation is that of an idiot) but then night fell and the roar of the monster was audible to all in the village, louder than before. It was dlear to all of us that the roar was that of a monster that was fantastically large, one that could come and eat us all if it chose (so awesome was its roar) thus it would be futile to battle with such a mighty beast. We resolved to make a sacrifice to the gods in order to appease them and bid the monster leave us. We placed all our harvest on the altar but lo! The gods were not appeased and the monster's roar grew louder. Then we placed all our chickens on the altar and sacrificed them but lo! The gods were still not appeased and the monster's roar grew louder still. Then we placed our cattle on the altar and sacrificed them but still the monster stayed. Then we burned our homes and our possessions but still this did not satisfy the gods. Thus there was no choice left but to fight the monster ourselves. We covered ourselves in warpaint, took up our spears and rain, chanting and screaming battle cries, into the woods. We could hear the monster's roar away in front of us at a clearing in the woods. In the middle of the clearing was a huge bush; obviously it was the monster's lair. Our hearts pounding, we ran behind the bus to face the monster. To our astonishment there was no monster but some large loudspeakers and a tape recorder; the source of the roar. We later found out that they had been put there by some scientists from the university of Bristol who were studying our behaviour.
The End
New Museum Store: Bedtime Story Pillowcase Set by David Shrigley